What I Learned in My 20’s

As I step into my thirties, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on what I learned in my twenties. If you want to hear my biggest takeaways from my 20's, keep on watching. 🙂

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In just a few weeks I'm going to be Turning 30 years old this last decade Has been such a crazy one filled with So Many Adventures starting with getting Married at 20 then having my first baby The next year buying our first house the Year after that and since then going on To buy a couple more houses I have four More babies start several businesses Visit 12 countries it's just been a Really packed decade and God has taught Me so much both through all of these Different projects that I've done and Also through all the challenges that I've faced both personal and emotional Challenges and then also external Challenges you know things like tackling Growing a business or buying a house so I thought that this would be such a good Opportunity turning 30 to reflect on Some of these lessons that I've learned Both to remember them and to share them With you guys Foreign [Music] I've organized these different lessons Into five categories finances physical Health emotional health spiritual health And relationships and have a few things To share with you in each of these Different categories I'm going to start Out with finances not because it's the Most important but because back at 20 Years old it was the first thing that I

Really started working on and the first Thing that I had some big goals for so The First Financial lesson that I want To share with you actually extends so Much further than Finance is it really Applies to just about everything and it Is this that if you do what everyone Else is doing you can only expect to get The results that everyone else is Getting said another way if you do the Normal thing to do then you can only Expect normal or average results so if You want to get results that are better Than average then you have to do Something different from what everyone Else is doing and that sounds easy on Paper okay I'll just do something Different but in reality practically it Ends up being really uncomfortable Because doing something different than Whatever knows is doing means you're Doing something weird and that is Uncomfortable and so here what I'm Talking about is instead of just going To college and getting a nine-to-five Job and trying to create success that Way you know maybe doing something Different like starting your own Business next here's the basic formula For Building Wealth first you have to Somehow earn money you have to have Money to make more money second you have To save that money that you earn because If you just spend it then it'll just be

Gone so you have to save it and then Third you have to invest it to grow your Money and if you don't do any one of Those three things then you won't build Wealth if you don't earn money then you Can't save it and you can't invest it if You don't save it then it'll just be Gone and if you don't invest it then It's going to stay pretty small and Never really turn into wealth and then The third Financial lesson I learned is That if you want to build wealth you Need to buy things that make you money Not things that cost you money so we Call those things that make you money Assets and the things that cost you Money liabilities so to give you a quick Example if you buy a car for your person General use especially if you buy on Payments you're going to be making those Payments every month it's costing you Money that's a liability but on the Other hand if you buy a property that You can rent out for profit then every Single month you're going to be earning Money from it so that's an asset okay so Now let's move on to physical health and Most of what I want to share with you is Centers around how to maintain your Weight how to maintain a healthy body Weight because this is something that I Struggled with for quite a long time I Used to easily maintain my weight I was Just like naturally skinny didn't matter

What I ate sort of thing then when I had My first baby I gained some weight and It turned into quite a struggle to try To figure out how to lose that weight And how to maintain a healthy weight and Spiraled into some eating disorders and So then I was just up and down it was a Mess but here's what I figured out about How to easily maintain your weight it Starts with emotional health and Happiness if you are happy and content Not depressed or anxious then it is much Easier to maintain your weight and I Know that that is way easier said than Done but that is really the thing that I Found made the biggest difference when I Was depressed or anxious I would eat my Feelings and that made it really really Hard to maintain my weight the second Little secret to maintaining right is Just getting enough sleep and the simple Reason for this is when you don't get Enough sleep then your body is Physically stressed it produces more Cortisol that tells your body to store More fat for emergency situations Essentially there might be a famine Coming you know it's stressed out and so Your body just stores away all the food That you eat as fat so getting enough Sleep super easy way or at least kind of Easy right sometimes it's a struggle to Get enough sleep but a super simple Thing that makes a big difference

Another thing that makes a huge Difference I think the thing that really Makes the biggest difference and the Thing that has to do with actually the Food you're eating is eat your Vegetables prioritize eating your Vegetables I know you might not like Them but if you can learn to like Vegetables it makes a huge difference And if you eat your vegetables first in Each meal not only does that really help To balance your blood sugar which just Naturally makes you store less fat away But it also means that you are Fuller so You don't eat more less healthy food That will pack on pounds and that leads Right into the next thing which is Avoiding processed foods and avoiding Packaged Foods now you don't have to cut Out those things completely but the more You eat real Whole Foods the easier it Will be for you to maintain your weight And the more vegetables you eat the more You'll find that that naturally just Pushes out those processed and packaged Foods another thing that makes Difference is drinking plenty of water This helps your body run well it keeps Your metabolism working up properly and It means that you are satiating your Thirst with water which has zero Calories rather than trying to eat food To satisfy that thirst you're feeling or Drink other things that have calories to

Satisfy your thirst and then the last Thing at least as far as eating goes is Eating less sugar however for a long Time I tried to make that the priority And I found that really hard because it Was so hard to eat less sugar when I was Hungry or eat less sugar when I was Stressed and so by prioritizing those Other things happiness and sleep and Water and eating vegetables it naturally Made it a lot easier for me to eat less Sugar I think the eating less sugar is Actually one of the main things that Helps to easily maintain your body Weight but it's a really hard thing to Start with okay and then just a couple Other quick physical health lessons I've Learned one of them is just that Exercise doesn't impact your body weight Very much at least not nearly as much as What you eat does and getting out of Sleep and being happy it can help Obviously to develop your muscles and to Strengthen your body and that can help You to be overall healthier and to get Sick less often and things like that but It's not really the best way to lose Weight you really want to prioritize Your emotional health and your diet First if you want to lose weight and Then finally the easiest most effective Way to exercise especially in a limited Amount of time is by doing kettlebell Swings I bought this adjustable weight

Kettlebell six seven or eight years ago Now and and I've used it more than any Other piece of exercise equipment I've Ever bought I've used it the most Consistently and by spending just a few Minutes a day doing about 60 to 100 of These two hand kettlebell swings I find That that has the biggest impact on my Strength and my physical health and my Just my fitness level essentially more Than any other workout that I found and It takes so little time okay so now Let's move on to emotional health and I Actually just have one thing to share With you here even though this is such a Big and such an important topic the Reason is because this one thing I'm Going to share with you it is the the One thing that made a huge difference For me and I think that unless you have Any sort of like brain chemistry issue Your emotional health is really best Supported by taking care of your Physical health your spiritual health And having healthy relationships and With that Foundation emotional health Just falls into place but if you do have A brain chemistry issue then it doesn't Matter how perfect all of those other Things are you can still feel really Depressed or anxious or struggle with Other issues and that's where I was I Felt like I was working on those other Things and making improvements in all of

Those other things and I was still Really struggling with clinical Depression and also with anxiety and I Tried a lot of different things a lot of Different supplements different diets Some different medications tried doing a Thankful illness or gratitude journal And different habits like that and Nothing really seemed to make a Difference until I read this book called The Mood cure which is a book about Amino acid therapy so if you're not Familiar amino acids are the building Blocks of proteins they're what proteins Are made out of some people naturally Tend to be deficient in one of the amino Acids and it might be because they're Not getting enough of it in their diet Or it might be because their body is Improperly metabolizing that amino acid So in other words maybe it's just Running through that amino acid way too Quickly metabolizing it too fast or Maybe it's metabolizing it too slow so It never really has enough of it and Those neurotransmitters are things like Serotonin and dopamine they're really Important chemicals that your brain Needs in order to feel calm or feel Happy or feel sleepy at the right time Of day anyway so I read this book called The Mood Cura and in it it helps you to Self-diagnose which of these different Amino acids you might be deficient in

And then you can take them as Supplements and of course being just Parts of proteins they're completely Safe and healthy for you to take so There's no really side effects you need To worry about and after doing this and Trying a few different amino acids I Found one that made a huge difference For me and it is 5-HTP it's a pretty Affordable and easy to find amino acid Supplement and by taking this just once Each evening I have experienced a huge Difference in my mood it's basically Completely eradicated my depression and Taken care of I'd say 90 of my anxiety Which has changed my life so much now Just a couple things to keep in mind if You're are interested in trying this for Yourself one 5htp is not going to be the Answer for everyone I would highly Recommend reading the book The Mood cure And figuring out which one is right for You and then the second thing is it's Not an instant fix you take it and you Don't feel anything right away in fact It normally takes me about like four to Seven days before I really start feeling A difference and even when you do feel The difference it's so subtle and feels So natural that it's easy and I've made This mistake over and over again really Easy to feel like it wasn't the Supplement that's actually making the Difference and that you just happen to

Feel happier over and over again I've Taken 5 HTP for a while and then thought I'm fine I don't need this anymore stop Taking it and then crashed and burned Real hard and had to go back on it so Now I just know I just need 5-HTP I'm Just naturally deficient in it I don't Know exactly why but I'm really glad That I figured out that I need it Because taking it makes a huge Difference for my emotional health now Let's move on to spiritual health now I Need to preface this by sharing I'm a Christian and if you're not a Christian Then these things that I'm going to Share they won't really apply to you and If you're not a Christian then the first Steps to working on your spiritual Health would be to study the Bible and Evaluate your relationship with God and Figure out what you need to do to get Right with God and those answers can be Found in the Bible but now let's move on To the spiritual lessons that I've Learned as a Christian the first one is That trusting God Is Not A Feeling Trusting God means to obey God even when It doesn't seem to make sense to do so a Couple years ago I read through extended Children's story Bible with my kids and It was really interesting to be able to Read through the entire Bible in just a Few weeks and really get a great idea of The big picture especially with the Old

Testament and I started to notice a Pattern and the pattern was that over And over and over again God told the Israelites and sometimes other people to Do things that did not make sense like He has a bigger plan in mind and if we Just step forward in faith and trust him And are obedient then he is going to Support us and he's going to work all Things together for our goodness and for His glory and for a long time I thought That trust in God was a feeling I Thought I needed to try really hard to Trust God and believe God but what I've Come to realize is that actually I just Need to step out in faith and do what God is calling me to do even if it Doesn't make sense and that I don't need To worry about the feeling aspect I just Need to do what he's asking me to do and That is physically trusting God the next Lesson I learned which is really closely Tied to the first one is that God Doesn't just promise to get us through Challenges when we Face a challenge or a Hard time or something difficult and we Try to trust God we try to lean on God We try to faith that God will get us Through this God promises to do so much More than that it's not just about Surviving it is about thriving God God Is putting those difficult circumstances In our life and he's putting the Blessings in our life just the same to

Help us to grow closer to him to help to Work character in us and work Perseverance in us to grow our faith in Him to increase our trust in him to give You an example of what I'm talking about A few years into my marriage my husband And I were having some marriage issues And my marriage was just really not how I wanted it to be and I saw my husband As the problem there was a lot of things That he wasn't doing that I felt were Being so problematic and so difficult to Deal with and I kept praying for God to Solve the problem for God to essentially Fix my husband and we'd go to marriage Counseling and try to figure out how to Fix these issues and I wanted the Marriage counseling to somehow fix my Husband and make the problems go away But what I finally realized after Several years was that God didn't need To fix the problem God had put that Problem in my life on purpose to lead me To trust him more because I wasn't Trusting him I was trying to find Fulfillment and satisfaction in my Husband and but really that could only Be found in Christ and I needed to learn That lesson and once I finally did learn That lesson or at least learn in part I'm sure I'm still working on it but Learn it in part that was when things Really started to get better in my Marriage when I stopped looking to my

Husband to give me happiness here on Earth and I started looking for Happiness in God fulfillment in God and Storing of Treasures in Heaven as it Says in the Bible okay so now let's move On to relationships and I'm going to Start with a marriage related thing Since that's what I was just talking About and then I'll move on to a couple Friendship type things So marriage thing marriage the thing That makes marriage so special and so Different from pretty much any other Relationship we have here on Earth is The commitment when two people are 100 Committed to each other that allows both People to be completely all in to Completely trust each other to Completely be themselves around each Other to not hold anything back to not Be shy about anything and that is what Makes the marriage relationship so Beautiful and so special and if both People are not 100 all in then what You're left with is a shadow of the Glorious relationship that you could Have and I think that so many people Especially these days they get married And they are promising to stay with the Other person forever unless XYZ or Probably forever or as long as they can Deal with it or something like that and That sets their marriage up for failure From the start because they are are not

100 committed they're not committed Forever and I say other people but the Reason I'm listing this as a lesson I've Learned in my 20s is because that was Something I had to overcome myself when It got married I planned for it to be Forever but then in the messy middle Things got really difficult and I felt Like I wanted a way out and I realized Eventually that it wasn't going to work Unless I was 100 committed forever no Matter what okay and then the last Lesson I wanted to share with you today Lesson I've learned in my 20s is about Friendship and so here's the story Earlier on in my 20s I was pretty Insecure I wanted to have more friends But I felt like I wasn't cool or Interesting enough for people to want to Be friends with me and I felt like that Was proved by how people acted toward me Like people didn't approach me or didn't Talk to me people didn't try to be Friends with me for the most part of Course some people did and I'm so Grateful and appreciative to those People who did reach out to me and who Pursued a relationship with me but Here's what I've learned most people Feel that way most people feel like Maybe they're not cool or interesting Enough for other people to want to be Friends with them and most people sit Around and wait for other people to come

And be friends with them most people sit Around and wait for people to reach out To them and to talk to them to initiate The Friendship so one of the nicest Things you can do for others and the Thing you need to do if you want to have More friends is stop waiting for people To take the initiative and instead reach Out and take the initiative yourself Introduce yourself to new people and Then follow up with them and actually Pursue having a friendship with them and I know it might feel awkward and it Might feel uncomfortable and it might Even feel like they're not reciprocating Or they're not interested and you can Quickly go back to feeling like I'm not Cool enough I'm not interesting enough But really they're probably just shy and They're probably not sure quite how to Respond most people want to have more Friends they want to have better deeper Friendships but it's just one of those Things where you have to step out in Faith and you have to act confident even If you don't feel confident and of Course to be yourself but push yourself A little bit outside of your comfort Zone it is not only a great way to Increase your number of friends and Develop good friendships but it also is Such a wonderful way to love people by Showing them love showing them care Showing them that you are interested in

Them and interested in getting to know Them well there you have it these are Some lessons that I've learned in my 20s Thank you so much for being a part of my 20s I love getting to share things with You here obviously normally here on my Channel I talk about things like Business and marketing but I think Sometimes it's nice to break it up and Share some personal lessons that I've Learned or give you some insights into My personal life so I appreciate you and Your patience with me as I share these Different things thank you so much for Joining me for this video I hope you Enjoyed it if you did give it a like to Let me know and if you happen to be new Here if you've just stumbled across this Video and you're new to my channel my Name is Gillian Perkins it's very nice To meet you normally here on this Channel like I said I talk about Business and marketing so if you have Any interest in starting an online Business of your own own if you have an Online business and you want to learn How to Market it and grow it then I Would love to have you subscribe for Videos like that in the future alright Well that's it for today thanks so much For watching and I'll see you again next Week